Tuesday, October 30, 2007

I love feeling nauseous.

Not really. But it's happening.
The last couple of days have been INSANELY frustrating, but I'm not going to even get into it on my blog. I don't think I could even get into it with a therapist. Or a combination analyst/therapist. (First one who gets that reference wins a cookie. And I make good ones, too.) What I've got lurking in the darkest reaches of my brain would send them screaming.
Ever get the feeling that you're being punk'd? Like Ashton Kutcher is going to pop out with that stupid trucker hat any second now to laugh hysterically in your face? (Joke's on you, Ashton - have fun getting that bloody lip sewn up.) If I had a nickel for every time I said in a week, "You've gotta be kidding me," or "This has to be some kind of sick joke," I'd be able to quit my job and buy an island somewhere that doesn't even know what MTV is.
So this shall be my rant for the day. I expect the mood to continue for the next few - but life goes on. Luckily there are a few good, totally unexpected things and people happening in my life right now that keep me smiling on the outside.

Monday, October 29, 2007


What a weekend.
First, the Halloween party on Saturday. It was rad, despite a couple of minor incidents , and pictures will be posted as soon as they're uploaded from the digital camera. Jeremy, if you're reading this, thanks for coming - it was awesome to have you just randomly show up like that! - and I hope you and Becca had a great time.

So after the party, I went to work on half an hour's sleep - bad idea. I was a zombie throughout, but it was worth it. I was so tired I took a nap in the adjoining banquet hall on my lunch break. I was so sleepy when I got home that I only caught an inning of...wait, what happened last night? Oh yeah.

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World Champions.

*EDIT* (March 5, 2008) - I'm noticing a lot of traffic directed to this post from Google images. If you happen to be one of those getting here from a Google image search, could you drop a comment and let me know what you searched for to get here? I'm just curious - thanks.

I read somewhere (sources? I don't need no stinkin' sources!) that, during the postgame celebration, a loud contingent of Red Sox fans chanted "Yankees suck! Yankees suck!"
Now, I'm not going to debate the fact that the Yankees do, in fact, suck. We have all known this for a long time now (well, most of us - you know who you are!), but the whole idea of a "Yankees suck" chant seems defeatist and just plain dumb when you aren't even PLAYING the Yankees.
Now that the Red Sox have become the team of the moment to either love or hate (dare I say it? the new Yankees), those idiots from the Bronx are becoming, in Jimmy Carter's words (kindof), increasingly irrelevant. It's high time Red Sox fans realize what they've got - two world championship trophies more than the Yankees in the past four years, 25 guys that love playing in Boston, and - dare I say it? - the makings of a possible dynasty hardly whispered at since that other team from New England reeled off wins in three of the last six Super Bowls and are in a beautiful spot from which to do it again this year. The Yankees shouldn't even matter anymore. Yes, I'm well aware of the deep rivalry. But maybe we should be enjoying this one without thoughts of the Evil Empire lurking in the background. It's juvenile, immature, and really, completely irrelevant.
So A-Rod has opted out of his contract and there's talk about bringing him to Boston. I have mixed feelings about this whole thing. First of all, we need to remember that he isn't a born third baseman - he only got there due to the Yankees' Derek Jeter dilemma - with an All-Star shortstop already, that was really the only place to put him. So we need to keep that in mind, because there's no way Mike Lowell is replaceable - unless, of course, he asks for an unholy amount of money as his contract is up this year - which I don't really see happening. So you could bring in A-Rod to replace Lugo at short. I guess I'd be okay with that.

The aforementioned work on my arm is done. It's a bad picture at a bad angle, but you get the idea (well, I hope so - it's a butcher's diagram of a rabbit). It's on my left bicep, in case the angle of the picture is throwing you off. I love it, love it, love it.

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I've had an odd obsession with escape movies recently. Here from Netflix now is the first two discs from the second season of "Prison Break", as well as the old Clint Eastwood flick "Escape from Alcatraz." If anyone wants to interpret that for me, you're more than welcome. I should mention that the final episode of the first season of "Prison Break" (the part where the President, etc. are in a kitchen, supposedly in D.C., was filmed ten feet below me during dinner service one night at the Fairmont Hotel. We attempted to crash the set prior to filming by strategically placing bottles of fish sauce and Nutella in random locations and scratching our initials into boxes, but the director must have noticed because there's no sign of any of it on the final cut.

That's it from me, have a good night, y'all.

Wednesday, October 24, 2007


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As reported by numerous news agencies, lifelong Yankees fan Rudy Giuliani announced in Boston that he's rooting for the Red Sox to win the World Series.

"If I keep looking at that hat, I may start crying," he said to chuckles, before adding, "Good luck to the Red Sox!"

Pundits immediately declared the comments a shameless play for votes from a man whose name is almost synonymous with Bronx Bomber - a big-game regular in the box seats next to the Yankee dugout....

"The next time he goes to Yankee Stadium, we will boo," vowed Charlie Egan, 36, a carpenter from Rockville Centre, L.I. "Yankee fans forget nothing."

"He said that?" exclaimed a shocked Bob Herbert, 49, a Brooklyn maintenance worker. "He should be ashamed of himself."

"He is doing what Hillary did," Herbert added, referring to Democratic front-runner Hillary Clinton, whom Giuliani mocked just last week for dividing her loyalty between the Yankees and the .National League Cubs of her native Chicago. "He is just doing it for votes."

The GOP front-runner insisted his sudden conversion to Red Sox fandom was "not just because I'm here in Massachusetts."

"In Colorado, in the next week or two, you will see, I will have the courage to tell the people of Colorado the same thing, that I am rooting for the Red Sox in the World Series," he said.

But the former mayor will still have the electoral math on his side. Colorado has a total of nine Electoral College votes, compared with about 30 in Red Sox Nation - Massachusetts, Vermont, New Hampshire, Maine, Rhode Island and about half of Connecticut.

"Go Red Sox! 9/11!"

On another note, call me overly involved, paranoid, whatever. According to the USDA website, they will answer any question in five business days. According to my count, tomorrow will be five. If I don't hear from them by then, I'm contacting my congressman to see if I can't get this explained.
So that's it from me.

Monday, October 22, 2007

This just about sums it up.

Tessie is the Royal Rooters rally cry
Tessie is the tune they always sung
Tessie echoed April through October nights
After serenading Stahl, Dinneen and Young
Tessie is a maiden with a sparkling eye
Tessie is a maiden with a love
She doesn't know the meaning of her sight
She's got a comment full of love
And sometimes when the game is on the line
Tessie always carried them away
Up the road from "Third Base" to Huntington
The boys will always sing and sway

Two! Three! Four!

Tessie, "Nuf Ced" McGreevey shouted
We're not here to mess around
Boston, you know we love you madly
Hear the crowd roar to your sound
Don't blame us if we ever doubt you
You know we couldn't live without you
Tessie, you are the only only only

The Rooters showed up at the grounds one day
They found their seats had all been sold
McGreevey led the charge into the park
Stormed the gates and put the game on hold
The Rooters gave the other team a dreadful fright
Boston's tenth man could not be wrong
Up from "Third Base" to Huntington
They'd sing another victory song

Two! Three! Four!

Tessie, "Nuf Ced" McGreevey shouted
We're not here to mess around
Boston, you know we love you madly
Hear the crowd roar to your sound
Don't blame us if we ever doubt you
You know we couldn't live without you
Tessie, you are the only only only

The Rooters gave the other team a dreadful fright
Boston's tenth man could not be wrong
Up from "Third Base" to Huntington
They'd sing another victory song

Two! Three! Four!

Tessie, "Nuf Ced" McGreevey shouted
We're not here to mess around
Boston, you know we love you madly
Hear the crowd roar to your sound
Don't blame us if we ever doubt you
You know we couldn't live without you
Tessie, you are the only only only
Don't blame us if we ever doubt you
You know we couldn't live without you
Boston, you are the only only only
Don't blame us if we ever doubt you
You know we couldn't live without you
Red Sox, you are the only only only

Dropkick Murphys - "Tessie"

Sunday, October 21, 2007

The Worst Documentary Ever?

I kid you not - I was just browsing around the "recommendations" section to see what stupid movie Netflix thinks I should see now when I come across:

"Helvetica. We use it every day on our computers, we see it on street signs -- and we take it for granted. Now, Gary Hustwit's unique documentary introduces us to Helvetica, whose readability has made it the most popular font in the world. Interviews with designers and artists offer insight into the development, use and universal acceptance of Helvetica as the typeface of choice for everything from writing letters to creating corporate logos."

Let me see if I got this right. Someone made a movie about a FONT. And expects me to PAY to watch it. Huh.

Speaking of movies, I saw Blood Diamond last night. The idea was dramatic enough...but there was practically no character or story development. I'm sorry, Leo, but one scene of "my parents were brutally murdered when I was 9" does not a tragic figure make. So, I can't recommend that one, either.

It's 1:00 and I'm still in my pajamas. So it's time to go fix that. But first, something to read for the day.
I ran across this article by Roland Martin while browsing through my del.icio.us bookmarks, and while it's six months old, the issue will be relevant for years to come:

"When did it come to the point that being a Christian meant caring about only two issues,­ abortion and homosexuality?

Ask the nonreligious what being a Christian today means, and based on what we see and read, it's a good bet they will say that followers of Jesus Christ are preoccupied with those two points.

Poverty? Whatever. Homelessness? An afterthought. A widening gap between the have and have-nots? Immaterial. Divorce? The divorce rate of Christians mirrors the national average, so that's no big deal."

Read the rest of the article here.

He's right. Why do Christians such as myself hesitate to be labeled as "Christian"? It isn't a point of embarrassment, it isn't that I'm afraid of being called a "Bible thumper" or a "Jesus freak," it's that I'm tired of being associated with the psychos who hijack the name of Christ to advance their personal wars.

I refuse to be associated with Jerry “The ACLU is to Christians what the American Nazi party is to Jews” Falwell or Pat "assassinate Hugo Chavez" Robertson, because we don't believe in the same God. Sorry, Reverends, but the Jesus I signed up with taught peace, love, and compassion (yeah, all of that hippie crap you guys are so scared of!), not fear, hatred, and intolerance. As long as "Christians" like these continue to use their bully pulpits to push their warped agendas, I'll continue to make it very clear what exactly it is I believe in when I'm identified as a Christian.

And I'm not trying to say that there's no such thing as a Republican Christian. But don't castigate me for being a Democrat. Don't tell me I support the "mass murder of unborn babies." By the way, I don't LIKE the idea of abortion by any stretch of the imagination - who does? - but in six and a half years in office, what has GWB done to end abortion in America? And yes, I understand the mathematical theory behind "There's no such thing as 100% safe sex," but it seems rather obvious to me that you can't have your cake and eat it too. You can't avoid teaching kids to have safe sex, and then bemoan the rising abortion rate - because if someone doesn't know what a condom is, they won't use one, leading to pregnancy, leading to abortions. Point is, abstinence-only education is only giving rise to the number of abortions in this country.

One last, last thing. WOW.

Thursday, October 18, 2007

And again...

Domain Name
usda.gov ? (U.S. Government)
IP Address
199.128.117.# (USDA Office of Operations)
USDA Office of Operations
Continent : North America
Country : United States (Facts)
State : District of Columbia
City : Washington
Lat/Long : 38.9097, -77.0231 (Map)
English (U.S.)
Operating System
Microsoft WinXP
Internet Explorer 6.0
Mozilla/4.0 (compatible; MSIE 6.0; Windows NT 5.1; SV1; .NET CLR 1.1.4322; InfoPath.1)
version 1.3
Resolution : 1152 x 864
Color Depth : 32 bits
Time of Visit
Oct 18 2007 8:39:53 am
Last Page View
Oct 18 2007 8:39:53 am
Visit Length
0 seconds
Page Views
Referring URL

Visit Entry Page
Visit Exit Page
Out Click

Time Zone
Visitor's Time
Oct 18 2007 9:39:53 am
Visit Number

If you don't hear from me, see you when I get back from Guantanamo.

I sent the USDA another message stating:

"I asked a question a couple of days ago, and while it was answered to my satisfaction, I noticed that my personal blogs were visited a total of three times by USDA employees after my question was sent. Could you explain to me the reason for doing this, and how you found my blogs in the first place? If there's something in the PATRIOT Act regarding this, by all means, go ahead, but I was a little surprised to see visitors as I made no mention of either blog (or even the fact that I had one) in the question I asked.

So we'll see what happens with that.

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

The government is stalking me.

Or, something strange is going on.
Yesterday, I visited the USDA website to get the full text of this year's Farm Bill and to email them regarding some clarifications I needed. I used the USDA's comment form, typed in my question with email address, and was on my way.
Frequent readers of this blog (both of you) will remember my post last week about SiteMeter, the tool attached to this blog which allows me to check up on who's reading this. So imagine my surprise when I checked my statistics an hour later to find:

Domain Name
usda.gov ? (U.S. Government)
IP Address 168.68.1.# (USDA Office of Operations)
ISP USDA Office of Operations
Continent : North America
Country : United States (Facts)
State : Maryland
City : Bowie
Lat/Long : 38.9576, -76.7566 (Map)
Language English (U.S.)
Operating System Microsoft WinXP
Browser Firefox
Mozilla/5.0 (Windows; U; Windows NT 5.1; en-US; rv: Gecko/20070914 Firefox/
Javascript version 1.5
Resolution : 1280 x 1024
Color Depth : 32 bits
Time of Visit Oct 16 2007 10:29:45 am
Last Page View Oct 16 2007 10:29:45 am
Visit Length 0 seconds
Page Views 1
Referring URL
(my old blog)
Visit Entry Page http://natehamilton.blogspot.com/
Visit Exit Page http://natehamilton.blogspot.com/
Out Click
Time Zone UTC-6:00
Visitor's Time Oct 16 2007 10:29:45 am
Visit Number 97

Curiouser and curiouser. Not only did someone at the USDA office look at this page, but they got here through a link from my old blog! I've googled the heck out of this, and I can't find any way to get to EITHER blog from the information I provided in that email to the USDA.
It's not like I'm worried, I'm not sitting here typing anything too inflammatory - that is, until criticism of a sitting administration becomes an actual crime - but I am slightly bothered by the fact that someone in the USDA feels like they need to check up on me. Don't forget, as well, the million-dollar question: How did they even find my blogs? Did I miss something in the Patriot Act?
I'm angry and I'm actually going to call them on this - I'll email them back and see if I get any more hits on here. What I say in the internet is completely irrelevant to the question I've asked, wouldn't you agree?
But, to the United States Government - I don't need my question answered anymore. I haven't found the answer, but if you feel like you need to dig through my blogs to properly answer my question, I'll find another avenue, thank you very much. Go find something better to do with your time.

Saturday, October 13, 2007

Oh, come on.

Excuse my rambling. I've got half an eye on the Red Sox game.

Anthony Bourdain is becoming increasingly irrelevant.
In an article in People magazine (it was posted on Fark.com, NO, I don't read People), Bourdain tore into "celebrity chef" Rachael Ray for her promotion of Dunkin' Donuts.

"I'm not a very ethical guy. I don't have a lot of principles. But somehow this seems to me over the line. Juvenile diabetes has exploded. Half of Americans don't have necks. And she's up their saying, 'Eat some [...] Dunkin' Donuts. You look great in that swimsuit – eat another doughnut! That's evil," Bourdain said.

Take a minute to find the irony of this coming from a man who:
1. claims to smoke three packs of cigarettes a day - is there any better example of people being conned into doing something bad for them thanks to good advertising?)
2: goes to great lengths to prove that his body is an amusement park, not a temple, and
3: whom I wouldn't be surprised to find on my front step one day in a white-collared shirt and tie trying to convince me how much happier my life would be if I would just drink a pint of duck fat a day.

Of course, we ARE talking about Dunkin' Donuts here (which doesn't hold a candle to the flavor of duck confit, in my opinion), but it's a little condescending and elitist to eschew one kind of fat over another, just because you think your palate is more refined.

And what has the world come to where people care to hear the thoughts of a chef who wrote some overblown, testosterone-laced half-work of fiction about life in a professional kitchen? (For that matter, what has this world come to where people care what I think about Anthony Bourdain?) (Just a personal note - yes, Kitchen Confidential was entertaining. But true? Don't believe everything you read.)

But I'm gonna tell you anyway. Being a cook, I get asked fairly often what I think about Rachael Ray, Alton Brown, Emeril Lagasse, and the rest of the Food Network crew. The popular action among professional cooks is to brush them aside as a waste of space, "not real chefs," and
(especially in Emeril's case) "sellouts." In my humble opinion, this is the thoughtless idiocy of the cooks who got into this business because they believed the lies Bourdain spews. But let's overlook all of that in favor of what these cooks, and as a whole, the Food Network, have done for the restaurant business. Long story short, a television network dedicated to happy, exciting personalities introducing the mass public to different styles of food, different kinds of cuisine, and more interesting ingredients can only be good for the restaurant business.
As a cook, I might get castigated for this opinion, but I find it verrrrry difficult to argue. It allows the restaurant I work in to serve things like beet sorbets, goat cheese, and mache, instead of the same old steak/mushroom/red wine, pasta/chicken/vegetable/cream sauce, and romaine lettuce/caesar dressing/roasted garlic combinations. Educating the public about what we do is GOOD. In my view, it's like what television did for Major League Baseball (and, to reverse-engineer that statement, what the lack of television coverage has done to the NHL). Expand the market, expand the fan base. How could this be any more clear?

Anyways. On to another topic. I've been sitting in my apartment almost all day (save for about an hour outside - it's just one of them days), so I've got a lot to say. Bear with me.
I watched the Top Chef reunion special today. I hate reunion specials. I did have an interesting debate with myself, though (wow, could I possibly come off as any more of a loser?). Bravo set up a montage during the special of (the eventual winner) Hung's use of the sous vide technique. Sous vide entails vacuum-sealing any kind of food in plastic and poaching it slowly in water. It's a fairly "new" technique, invented in the 1970s in France but is quickly coming into fashion as chefs realize that a tough meat cooked by the sous vide method comes out of that plastic bag exquisitely tender.
Personally, I'm not a huge fan of it. Aesthetically (can I use that word to talk about flavor and texture? Let's run with it.), I like my food to have some texture. A melt-in-your-mouth braise, to me, tastes and feels entirely different than something poached for four hours in a bag. But more importantly, at what point do we let machines do all of the work? At what point to we keep our hands off altogether and turn into a Jetsons-esque eating culture, in which all of our food comes out of a robot? If a food doesn't have soul, it doesn't have anything. (It sounds cliched, but it's true.) If things continue the way they are, we'll lose the ability to cook altogether.
But where is the line drawn? I'd fervently argue for technological innovations like gas burners, brulee torches, and deep-fryers. Does this make me a hypocrite? Or just unwilling to let the standards slip any more? Does it even matter, as long as the food comes out great?

The Red Sox have lost in grand fashion (giving up 7 runs in the 11th (Thanks, Eric Gagne! - and you've gotta click on this link - it's hilarious AND and apt metaphor.) )- I think that's it from me. I have nothing else even remotely relevant to say.

To all you cheaters:

You're BUSTED.
I've got a nice little program attached to my blog called SiteMeter. I'm a sucker for stats, so it helps me keep up with how many people are looking at my blog, where they're from, and how they got there. For example, if you were to Google anything on the blog, then click on the blog from the results page, I would know exactly what you searched for in order to get here.
So imagine my surprise yesterday when I checked out SiteMeter and found the number of visitors to this page had risen exponentially. Sorting by location, I found a number of odd places - I've had visitors from cities from where I know no one. So I'm thinking, how are people from Jackson, Mississippi; Winnipeg, Manitoba; Custer, Washington; Lexington, Kentucky; and Portland, Oregon finding this page? Clicking on the "details" section, I discovered that one of my first posts was coming up in the first page of a Google search, with everyone searching for the phrase "eponymous rink jump." My best guess is this clue had appeared in a nationally-syndicated crossword puzzle in the past few days.
You little cheaters!
By the way, the answer is "SALCHOW."

Note: This post isn't as vitriolic as it may seem - please, I Google answers to crosswords all the time. I got nothin' but love for y'all. Just thought it was funny.

Who can remember the last time I had a Saturday off? Me neither. And I've got NEXT Saturday off, too - I must've done something good. So, of course, I'm off to waste it in front of the baseball game and doing who knows what else.

Note, part 2: I just started my first cup of coffee, so please excuse the fact that this post might very well be the most disjointed thing I've ever written in my entire life.

Tuesday, October 9, 2007


I have to be up in three hours and thirty-four minutes, to be precise, and I'm wide, wide awake. There's nothing really in particular keeping me up, I've just got a lot on my mind right now, I guess, for no particular reason at all. It's too late to take a sleeping pill or drink some tea (or maybe some of that five month old Valium in my cabinet - is that still good, you think?), so I've gotta try it the natural way. Darn it all anyways.

See, what did I tell you about baseball? The Yankees suck and the Red Sox don't. In all seriousness, it fascinates me when an All-Star team like the Yankees starts the season 21-29, and from that point forward has the best record in baseball, only to blow it in the first round (which they've done for three consecutive years now, and haven't won a World Series since 2000). I don't get how so much money can be spent on a team that quite simply, doesn't get the job done. Anyways, the next round should be interesting. Four very good teams are left and there's some great baseball to be played yet. The Red Sox and Indians finished the 2007 campaign with identical records, while the Rockies and Diamondbacks played 19 times this season and virtually split them. So I doubt any one of the four is headed to the championship on the heels of a sweep.

Both of my tattoos are getting reworked in the next couple of weeks. Ideas are coming together. I'm not even going to ask for opinions since, well, a tattoo is such a personal thing, and it's me that's got to deal with it for the rest of my life. But I like what I'm thinking of so far. Sketches have been made and outlines have been drawn, from this point forward it's all about the artist doing his thing and reworking so it fits. If I were a bit more ambitious, I'd get something insane drawn across my back. The entire score of Beethoven's Fifth. The "George Washington Crossing the Delaware" painting by Emanuel Leutze. 40 different recipes containing foie gras. A detailed major-league baseball field as viewed from the batter's box. You get the idea - but you know what they say about the best laid plans of mice and men**...so I'm sticking small. So nothing more will be revealed at this point - the next you'll hear on this subject should be when they're done.

Three hours, twenty four minutes...let's try this "goodnight" thing again.

**(they often go astray).

Stressed over something stupid.

Irony: (noun):
Everything that really should stress me out is rolling right off my back. It's the little annoyances that are really bothering me right now.

Does anyone else NOT have a Halloween costume yet? I've been wracking my brain for ideas, and I guess I just haven't been in a creative mood the last few weeks. It doesn't help that we're throwing a huge party (you're all invited, by the way - Saturday, Oct. 27th - you all know my phone number to get my address), where costumes are absolutely required. All the ideas I have would be difficult to tastefully pull off - Barack Obama, zombie Jerry Falwell, pre-steroids Barry Bonds...so, the search continues.

Check out my friend Jenn's work. She does jewelry and metalworking stuff. It'd be pretty cool if I was a girl, I guess.
So go here and buy things.

Sunday, October 7, 2007

Go America.


"We're interpreting the Geneva Convention properly" turns into "If we didn't torture and something happened, you'd ask why we didn't torture (9/11 9/11 9/11)" turns into "We get to decide what the Geneva Convention really says" turns into "We don't care what the Geneva Convention says."
Dana Perino is obviously a little uncomfortable. Good. When your Press Secretary starts to sound like a 9th grader in speech class, you've got problems, you think? Anyone else tired of this administration's blatant disregard of the law?

Friday, October 5, 2007

Friday night randomness

Let's get one thing out of the way - Yankees suck, Red Sox don't. Seriously, how can anyone not love baseball right now? We've got two teams in the playoffs that really shouldn't be (the Rockies and the Phillies), incredible parity in the league as a whole (no teams with 100 wins), and at the dawn of the playoffs, some great, great games. You've got to love October.

So where was I going? Oh yes. There's a reason you haven't heard from me for a week. See, we had a fuse blow, and then when we plugged everything back in, the computer monitor wasn't working. It took us until this afternoon to realize that the monitor wasn't broken, it just had an extra on/off switch, which, of course, was off. (We're not that dumb - you have to be Indiana Jones to find the stupid thing.) I blame my roommate - she's supposed to be good with technology (no, NOT because she's Asian, you stereotypers (is that a word?), because she says she's good with it). I also suck at technology. I'm about 20 years too young to be saying that, but alas, it's true.

I have a cat on my lap and Mozart playing in the background, so I feel a bit like a James Bond villain at the moment. The cats don't know they're leaving Saturday (they're just here while their real owner straightens out his living situation), but while I've grown a bit attached to them, they're getting too smart for their own good. I kid you not, they have figured out how to turn a doorknob and let themselves into a room. Insanity rules in this house.

Dinner's done so I'm out. Did you miss me?


I just logged in to Blogger and found this post sitting in the "saved" section, which I thought I had published. I figured I might as well publish it, as five-days-past as it may be. I also realized that I suck at technology - see next post.

If one begins to say something enough, does that make it true?
Is it possible to utterly and completely convince yourself of something if you just repeat it over and over?
I didn't think so, either. But it never hurts to ask.

It's been an odd Sunday, to say the least. I've had so much running through my head all day, and I've just been sitting here attempting to make sense of it all. But life goes on, huh? I could ask it to slow down all I wanted, and it wouldn't make a difference. (See: first sentence.) Compliance isn't one of this world's stronger suits.
I just ate a ton of Burger King, which my system craves even though I know it's terrible. My friends, especially the ones who are cooks, don't understand it. I can't say I do, either. But it's time I came to terms with the fact that I'm a junk food junkie. I don't necessarily see it as a bad thing. My palate's refined enough, and honestly, there's something about sinking my teeth into a Double Whopper after spending eight hours knee-deep in truffle oil and caviar that just knocks me out.
But I hate, hate, HATE the Olive Garden. I don't see it as a contradiction at all. Sure, Burger King uses liquid smoke and puts an unholy number of fat grams into my system (but at 6 feet and 145 pounds, I need all the fat I can get). But I don't care. At least Burger King doesn't try to trick me. Doesn't anyone else hate the Olive Garden commercials where they try make you believe their cooks have been trained in Italy? The ones that con you into believing that REAL ITALIAN families have reunions in their dining room(s?)? Do they really expect me to believe that there's an army of Italian grandmothers in the kitchen rolling meatballs? (Note to Rocco DiSpirito - bad idea.)
Don't even get me started with the layouts. All I'll say is if I was unfortunate enough to be caught in an Olive Garden while it burned to the ground - I wouldn't stand a chance.
But what really bothers me about the Olive Garden is the food. I'm not a snob - my allegiance to Burger King should be proof enough of that. And a certain lack of soul is expected from a chain with hundreds of locations. But, as Hung would say, "My monkey could cook better Italian food than that."